Proof that 5 outranks 8

For my crazy friend out there who for some strange reason believes that 8 is a better number than 5 here is some wonderful proof:

• Are there 8 dollar bills?
• Is all money, including coins, in denominations of 8?
• My number preset on your phone: 7777 let's break it down... 7+7+7+7=28, 2+8=10, half of 10.... 5!
• When my friend Amy eats candy or goldfish or what have you... she eats them in groups of 5
• Probably the most important... IT WAS MY BASEBALL NUMBER!!!

Check back frequently... i will add more... and believe me.. there are more.. i just wanted to give you a taste.. and 5 bullets is juuust enough

The Silver Lining...

So as many of you know by now, today is my last day at this law firm. For those who dont, the bastards that told me that they were no where near finding someone they liked for this job mislead me. Therefore, yesterday I got a call from my contact at the temp agency telling me that they hired someone who starts on Wednesday, making today, Tuesday, my last day.

So I walked in this morning feeling quite down because after all... who wants to go into a job, act like they give a damn, while all the while knowing that in 8 hours they will never see this place again.

BUT I FOUND THE SILVER LINING!!! Now anyone who has been a faithful reader thus far, will know exactly who i'm talking about. If you dont... you should go back and read the beginning posts... Now... the silver lining.. Read these three words...
NO
MORE
JUDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will never again, in my life, have to hear "Hiiii it's Judy from biling... you've been doing ____ right? because it should actually be done..."

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Also, for anyone who is interested... I'm wearing a pedometer today, to see how many steps I take in a day. That said... I'm off to begin my act. Later kids!

New York State Rules!

I think New York State might be trying to send all of us happy lesbians a message. Please take note of the picture to your right. My wonderful friend Sigi, sent me this link with fun facts about all the states. So, I mosey my way over to the page and find out that the State Mammal for New York is the BEAVER and the State Insect is the LADYBUG!!! I dont know about you... but I think they might be on to something there. Just a little thought nugget for you all to chew on this fine afternoon. Enjoy!

New York State Rules! Originally uploaded by sarahs.

My loves

These are my two favorite people in the world! One, of course my most favorite boy in the world (look at those dimples!!) and the other is my very hot girlfriend. This is the best picture I've ever seen of her!!!! Anyway, just wanted to share the objects of my affection with you all!

My loves Originally uploaded by sarahs.

Dirty Crack Whores, Broken Down Cars, I like Pizza, oh my!

This post will be my homage to my good friend Bethanie Jean. For all you fools who don't know... Beth is one of my greatest friends of allllll time (even though we go months and months without talking). We have a lot of history, this girl and I. Let me take you back... Join me on a ride through the wonderful world of what is one of the greatest friendships ever.

Ok, now... I met Beth when I was oohhh.. I dont know... 12 or 13. We both played baseball for this all-girls baseball league and she was on a rival team. Beth was the one to be FEARED!!! Everyone used to be petrified to go up against this fierce pitcher who looked like she had just walked out of a Glamour Shots shoot and had the attitude to match. No seriously... she did. So I remember my dad always used to say about her... it's good to go up against a fast pitcher.. that way, when you connect, it'll go further. Since then I feared not... just held feelings of contempt. I dont do well with people who have massive attitudes because they think they are great. I understand now that baseball was, is and always will be a very strong point for my Bethanie. She is an amazing player and has the trophies to prove it. Ok... so that was our first encounter in my memory.

Then she moved up to the next league and being a couple of years younger, I was still in the same league. I dont quite remember if it was the year after she left or if she took a year off (you can answer that for me at a later time doll) but while I was still playing in the Junior League, Beth came back to umpire our games. This is when I started to see the different side of my friend. I remember little things like there was one game where I hit a double I think and she was the baseline umpire and after I stood up she went running by and said "Nice hit" and I thought.. "hmm.. wow.. that's kind of cool" then that was the year that I also started catching quite a bit. Being an ump, she would be behind the plate at times and also I remember there was one game where I would flip her off behind my back jokingly. You can't do that with most umps. Whatever.. I was a kid.. what did I know. Oh, I must pause here and inform you all.. that when she would do the baseline umping she used to wear the SHORTEST SHORTS!!! I remember thinking... who wears shorts that short while umping a game. Whatever... it worked for her. She was very bad ass.

So from here... we fast forward a bit. I got older and therefore had to move up to Senior League and was place on Miss Bethanie Jean's team, with some very special people. This would be the time when she and I really started to connect. Beth actually got me my first job (even though it was a tad illegal because I was only 15... ahhh foxboro) Beth... remember the scavenger hunt at Walmart??!! LOL!!! Ok.. so yeah, there's not a whole lot to tell except that we were playing baseball together and eventually working together and somewhere along the way, a friendship was formed that would take armageddon to break. There were obviously a lot of other events that took place that made the friendship stronger.. but that's a quick snap shot of the background... Now... I will continue here and make as comprehensive of a list as I can give my time and that I'm at work of memorable moments throughout the wow... like 10 years that we've known each other.

• As mentioned before... the flipping off behind home place
• Also mentioned before... the Walmart Scavenger hunt. I do believe I did find the largest pair of women's underwear in that store though!!!
• Hi Steve... I like Pizza... Maybe... Steve, I want a chainsaw Steve...
• Broken down cars... 1) off the 140 exit going to foxboro and 2) at the Newport and Central Ave intersection... and my mom saw us!!!!
• Angels.
• Blinky, Sess, Crackhead, etc...
• The day you came to tell me about Jen Redo on my front steps
• Lemonade Soda
• WWF and TEST!!! Lol... If memory serves me correctly, I was the only girl screaming because all the guys were screaming for Trish. Maybe knowing what I do now... subconsciously I WAS screaming for Trish.
• Running around to find you shoes before Jamie and Greg's Wedding
• Peeing on the pitching mound at Dagget the day before the All Star game
• Facing each other at the All Star game
• Giving me the angel at the field
• 5 will always outlast 8... 555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555
• Me playing in my state tournament at URI, you coming to see me play, and then that whore totally cramping on our time together. OOOHHH I WAS PISSED!!!!! This is a story worthy of sharing. Ok... for everyone else still reading at this point. I was still playing baseball at this time and this annoying ass girl who was also on the team and Beth was coaching at the time. So... this girl was also a freshman at my high school. It was my senior year and I played tennis. My doubles partner and I made it to the State Tournament because we qualified through the Division Tournament and at the time, Beth was living down at URI, which also happened to be where the tournament was. So.. this annoying girl came down to watch a couple of us on the team play. So, after I finished my match, I decided to hang around with Beth and she was going to drive me home. This little bitch invited herself to stay also!!! Now, the little time I was getting to spend with my friend who i didn't see much was totally just cramped but this little punk. If this time spent was even remotely close to being "quality time"... the girl would have been.... two words... COCK BLOCK! I was soooo mad...
• My going away party...
• KMART
• Davenports and the fly
• BLIND CHUCKY!!!
• "Remember Me This Way"
• The cock block... gave me luggage tags as my going away present.... ooooooh
• Asking me if your boobs looked good at the wedding and then telling Jeff that my opinion mattered just as much as his... (that was Classic!)

There are so many more... but given time and again, that I'm at work... I'll have to stop here. Basically Beth, you know that there will NEVER be a time when you can't call on me and vice versa. Through everything that's happened in our own lives, I always know that I have a place of refuge in you. You are and always will be my best friend.

Love you doll!

Just call me Dixie!

For all of youse people (a nice good ol' homestyle RI term... youse) that are wondering or concerned... I'm doing quite well. The only thing I don't look forward to is the twice a day cleaning. Me no like... and Brie is still in her adjustment period. She said it's weird to see them still and she does still get a bit squeemish. Regardless.... I LOVE THEM!!!! I'll give you more updates as time progresses.

The one thing I've noticed more than anything... how for granted you take that they're just there. Having to be conscious of not hitting them on anything or leaning or what have you... it's tough!!! For those who are not so lucky to have my new friends... pretend like you do and you have to be careful what goes near them until they've healed... it's crazy how aware of them you become.

And... for anyone who has no clue what i'm talking about... a) how is it possible that you don't know and b) IM me and I'll fill you in.

Later kids!

The Cutest Kid on Earth!!

What up freaks... I added a Photo Album of a few pictures of my nephew... If you read my last post, he was referrenced as the one obsessed with my lovely girlfriend. Also, please take note in the picture of the pout face how HOTTT my girlfriend looks.

Ok, I must go nurse some soreness. Later kiddies!

Ferrys, Mopeds and 3 yr olds... oh my!

It's another dreary Wednesday morning and I sit here and contemplate what the hell I'm doing with my life. I just want a quick fix you know? I know I dont want to really be doing this, but it does pay the bills, but then again apart from something I need another degree for... What do I want to do? It's weird I go through these waves of emotion with this job. At times I can ride them and I'm fine and this job doesn't really bother me that much, but then at other times, like coming off of my glorious weekend when the waves just totally blow over me and I'm caught underneath. Any suggestions?

Apart from the sadness that is the living I currently make for myself... I must divulge about the Brie-riffic weekend. Let's start with Friday. We woke up and got an early start to our happy Brieday birthday and drove up to Agawam, Mass. Once again, Brie had a bit of a dream in the car. Now for those of you kiddies out there who don't know about Brie's dreams, let me give you a little refresher... Brie dreams a LOT and is very vocal during her dreams.... So vocal that you can egg her on and talk to her while she responds. So... I hear her start to mumble while I'm driving and I instantly knew she was dreaming. She proceeded to tell me to not touch the bear because it has fleas. Why I would even be in the remote presence of a bear, I have no idea, maybe it was Yoggi or Boo Boo or the one in the Big Blue House... who knows. Not after long, she wakes up and we arrive at Six Flags. It starts to drizzle a little, but we continue onward for our happy water park adventure. It was very early when we got there, so we did a couple of coasters first and then went to the water park. Ok... if there are only like 5 people other than you at a water park... Don't pay to rent the stupid tubes. A) The are a pain in the ass to lug around, B) they slow you down... and C) you can't ride the really good ones with them!! So.. after maybe 20 minutes, we got our deposit back and used the park provided ones. There is this ride... THE TORNADO!!! If you haven't felt the wrath of the Tornado... you don't know what you're missing... SERIOUSLY!! So, we did some slides and got some candy and made our happy way home. We weren't there long, but it was enough. So... I drive us home and almost fall asleep on the way... Man, that overcast will kill you! We got home around 2... both showered and then went and took a nap. Brie took a 4 HOUR NAP!!! Great way to spend a birthday. It actually did make for a great day. Then Tara and Darcy or Tarcy as I like to refer to them came by around 8. We sat around for a few and then headed over for the big SURPRISE party that 2 people totally gave away. I think she totally knew but played it off well. I wont discuss the rest of Friday night because for the most part anyone who would read this... was there. Except my lyss and we have enough to talk about... you dont need to hear about a party that you missed.. although.. there were plenty of lesbians there!!!

Ok... Saturday. We slept a little later than planned and got stuck is soooooooooooo much traffic, we missed the 11:45 ferry to the Blizzyock Island. We got to Galilee around 12 and had an hour and a half to wait for the next ferry, so we strolled down the street... went into a couple of stores and then made our way to the beach where we sat on some rocks and watched the boats go in and out of the harbor and talked about what we would name our dog when we got one. I dont think we ever agreed on anything. So, we got back and boarded the ferry and sat behind these really FAT people with a baby... oh my goodness. Ok.. first of all... we need to welcome these people to the wonderful world of upper lip hair removal techniques. Seriously... they looked like my cousin in the early 90s when we had a faint moustache. WHO TAKES A 2 MONTH OLD BABY ON A BOAT IN 80 DEGREE WEATHER WITHOUT A HAT ON AND IN A SLEEVELESS OUTFIT?!!! Seriously... i know who... big overweight women who don't know how to get rid of upper lip hair. It's not becoming at all. There is more room for making fun of these people, but I will never finish my recap of the weekend so... I must move on. So we arrive at Blizzyock Island, get off the boat and decide to go see how much it would be to rent a moped. We find a place and see that it's not too bad, so we rent one for two hours. Now, the signing of stuff isn't bad, but the training portion... Oi!

This deserves a new paragraph. Now... if you're going to have people train someone who's never been on a moped before..... DON'T GET PEOPLE WITH ACCENTS!!! No offense to people with accents... I love people with accents, but the friends that I have with accents are easy to understand. Not some dude from Germany or whatever who is like... *in a bad German accent* you do this and this this and then ride to the cone, turn around and ride back to me... blah blah blah blah... *break* I saw blah blah blah because he was probably saying something important but because he was going so fast and his stupid accent, I couldn't understand him... *back to bad accent* now you ride with your passenger because its very different... blah blah blah... ok i think you're all set *break* now... at this point, we sign off on everything and start to go... at the very beginning... the bike just naturally starts to go to the left. *bad accent* why are you on the left? *break* I said.. because that's the way the bike sort of went.. i'm getting back on the other side now... and we drove off. It put me in such a badddd mood. So, we left to go get something eat while I cooled off. The entire time I'm eating my bad gross sandwich i'm thinking "this was a bad idea to rent this effing thing." So... we finish lunch and get back on the g-dforsaken piece of metal and decide to ride out to the tip or at least as far as we could go. It was fine once we got going. Of course, if you exclude Brie trying to steer by steerying my hips and me every 2 minutes asking her "is there a car behind us?" Oh well.. it was fun... we had a good time. After we brought the moped back, we did some shopping... we got Tarcy gifts for taking care of Lulu... I found Tara the greatest sandals!!! One flip flop says "Drink" and the other says "Beer"... I knew she'd love them! Finally, we got back on the Ferry around 6pm and started out on the top deck, but found it was very cold and slowly made our way to the lower deck that is enclosed. Now.... we're there in the enclosed area that there are video games. Oh my gosh.. we saw this hideous girl playing a game.. *pictures to follow* That's pretty much that story... we headed home... both tended to our sunburns and went to sleep.

Sunday... It was rainy... we were supposed to go to Mosquomicut, but the rain spoiled those plans. So we spent the day shopping. We hit up good ol' Providence Place Mall... then some individual stores, then Emerald Square Mall (the staple). Then we went back to my parents and had dinner with them. That's was pretty much it.

Monday... so we thought, if it clears up then we'll go to Mosquomicut, it didn't clear up. So instead we slept in... went and had a late breakfast... I had 3 eggs, 3 strips of bacon, 3 links of sausage and 3 pancakes... it was DELISH!!!! Then we picked up my dad and went to see Alien vs. Predator... I thought it was great!!! Brie thought it was great!!! my dad thought it was ok. Whatever... it's cool. We ventured back home... Brie made a pound cake and then... we... went.... to... see.... EVAN!!!!!!! Evan for anyone who doesn't know is my nephew. Ok... let me straighten something out. He is actually my cousin's son, however... Jeff grew up as an only child and without a dad, so my parents were like his parents and he was like my brother... screw that... he is my brother. I love the dude to death. He is the one person if anyone were to ask that I look up to most. Anyway, when he and his wife got pregnant, they took me aside and told me that the baby was going to be my neice/nephew because I was Jeff's sister. It was sweet, awwwww... So yeah, Evan is my nephew and I am Auntie Sawarr and Brie is Auntie Brie... notice he can say her name perfectly.

Evan... also... deserves a new paragraph. This kid is 3 and a half and is completely OBSESSED.. OOOBBSSSEEESSSSSSEEEDDD with Brie. "Auntie Brie.. watch this" "Auntie Brie... come see this" "Auntie Brie.. come see my new bed" Sooooo cute. We also found out that every night they read him a story before bed... and every night, is a variation of "What's mommys favorite truck?" "What's Daddy's favorite truck" "What's Auntie Brie's favorite truck?" This child is the greatest! If you check my blog later tonight, I'll do a photo album of pictures we took of him Monday night. So great.

So that's pretty much it. We had dinner there and then headed home. It was a great great great weekend. Very relaxing and it was good to get to spend time with just Brie. We haven't gotten to spend much time alone lately. So it was nice. Thank you to everyone who came Friday night. She had a great time and she felt really loved!

It's about 10:30am now.. so I should actually do some work. Enjoy your day kiddies!!

I'm out like a fat kid in dodgeball!

BRIE BRIE'S BIRTHDAY!!

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIRTHDAY BIRTHDAY!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BABBBYYYY!!!!

I LOVE YOU TOOTS!!!

MMMWWWAAAAAHHHHH

Brie is 25 today... be sure to send her a happy birthday message on her bloggy..... You can find the link below!

Brie's Birthday Weekend

For all of you out there, the one or maybe two of you, who will miss my blogging these next 4 days.. have no fear... I plan to document the entire weekend via our happy little digital camera. I will have plentttyyy of pictures for you once we get back... *you should probably know here that I tend to talk a big game when it comes to taking pictures and usually don't end up with what i had originally planned* I do promise that i will take some though. Have a greatttt weekend and I'll be blogging when we get back.

Later kiddos!

Happy Belated Birthday!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADALYN ONE DAY LATE!!!!! I shall send something along to the good ol' carrot very soon! Heeeerrreee kitty kitty kitty!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Happy Birthday Carrie!!!!!!! It's this chicks birthday: http://clynnod.blogspot.com

Thank you everyone... nope wait... just Carrie

So to all of you kiddies out there that are soooooo interested in what we decided to do, which in actuality is only Miss Carrie Lynn because she's the only one that offered a response... We've decided spend the weekend alone, oh yeah along with the other hundreds of thousands that will be swarming to the beaches in RI this weekend. Whatever... free place to stay dude! And even though this may not be rugged enough for some of you... we will still be camping.. just in the backyard of 55 Warwick Road. Actually... that'll probably last one night and I'll say screw this, let's go sleep on the futon and up the stairs we shall go.

So that's the plan stan. Granted it would be better if my doggie daps chick was around, but alas... damn Koreans kidnapped her. So instead, i will go and just drool and leave fingerprints on the beloved Mustang. Tee hee hee... I can feel the wrath already!

Ok, I'm going to go and try to keep myself amused for the next 8 hours... Leave some comments (even though i know again, it will only be Carrie that will take on that task, but whatever... CARRIE RULES!)

Later assclowns

Anyone... Anyone... Anyone...

The time is 4pm. The darkness is setting overhead. Wind gustling around ever so quickly. Wwwiissshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... wwwiiiisssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... You can feel the pending storm breezing through the window.

Ok enough. I can't pull it off any longer. I'm bored... can you tell? Now ok I need some help from all you bloggers out there in Bloggy Blog Blog World. Friday is my brie brie's birthday. Now, originally we had planned to go camping this weekend. However, because we're all douchebags... we didn't think to make reservations sooner. So... calling around frantically today... I quickly found out that there is no where for us to go.

Then, we had these plans to spend the day on Block Island on Saturday and I thought about staying on the island that night instead, but the hotels are waaayyy too expensive.

So then, I thought about going to PTown for the weekend because the inns there are pretty cheap and we can always bring sleeping bags and a couple of us can sleep on the floor in our sleeping bags. Mind you... we've never been to PTown, so this would be new for us.

That's pretty much all I've got for ideas... Now what i need from all my happy bloggers (or the two that i know will read this) your opinion or ideas as to what we can do this weekend for my pumpkinhead's birthday.

THE VOTING LINES ARE OPENNNN... NOW!

Oh Happy Day

Yo yo bitchcakes and assclowns (yup... I still say it)!! It's oh about 11:14 and I'm pretty much deciding that I don't want to do anyyyy work. So what if I have a pile of papers sitting directly to my right that look like a tree exploded and landed on my desk. So, I must address a gripe I have.

If a person, who shall remain nameless were to write a blog about two chicks that have entered into her life and the person didn't really want to divuldge their names, so instead referred to them as X and Y... BE SURE TO BE CONSISTENT WHEN REFERRING TO THEM AS X AND Y!!!! you must read this blog: http://alyssainkorea.blogspot.com to understand. Read the blog just before the drunken blog and tell me if it makes sense... I guarantee you.. it wont!

So, i'm going camping this weekend. I'm excited about it. As I have said before in a previous post, I love camping.. as long as I'm equipped with at least a 12 pack of beer. However... what I'm excited about most!!!! Saturday = mopeds!!!! There i'll be a pasty white ghost (because i haven't been able to spend any time in the sun... damn Laywer Nazis) riding around Block Island on a moped. WOO HOO!!!

Speaking of being a pasty white ghost. I went to RI this weekend to see my parents for their anniversary.. SHIT IT'S TODAY!!! THANKS FOR THE REMINDER! Anyway, I'm standing in the back yard with my mom and she says to me "Sa, are you feeling ok?" and I not realizing her ever so famous sarcasim go "yeah mom... why" she goes... "you look awfully pale... are you sure you're not sick?" BITCH! You must realize here that my mom gets VERY VERY dark in the summer. Then she hits me with "Now who looks like their from New Haven?" HAHAHAHA!!! I thought that was pretty humorous.

Ok, I think I'm going to go get my light saber and fight off the evil pile of papers... Later kid!

Bubbles... not the chimp, the Drag Queen...

Ok, so any The L Word/Queer As Folk lover in CT has heard of Gotham Citi, and knows how most lesbians avoid it like the plague. So you can imagine why when we were invited to go meet up with some new friends there, we politely declined the offer. After much persistance, and a promise that it would be a very low key get together, a couple of beers, lounging on the couch, we decided to go for just a bit.

NOW THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING!!!

It just so happens that we get there just in time for the Drag Queen show (which as Drag Queen shows go.. it was weak)! So... The Busted Ass Bubbles enters the room. It just so happens that we had just popped a squat in a prime spot for Bubbles to perform. DIRECTLY BEHIND! So... Bubbles comes out in this get up that looks like something worn at some point during the "Last Dance" era of Donna Summer. May I also mention that Bubbles had nasty buck teeth and a stringy doll like wig to match. Bubbles.... was not a pretty Drag Queen. Ok, so before starting, Bubbles asks if it's anyone's birthday. It just so happens that our new friend Carrie's birthday is on Thursday of this week (Brie's is Fridays, but because I am a GOOD girlfriend... I spared her the embarassment). So Carrie's wonderful girlfriend Marina decided to point out to Glorious Bubbles that soon it would be in fact Carrie's birthday. Oh did Bubbles has a surprise in store for Carrie... now, what I must say here that the minute the spotlight was turned on Carrie... her face looked about the shade of the happy little coca-cola can sitting next to me. When I say it was red.... ooooohhh Lord... i mean, it was RED!

Now, Bubbles begins to do her really poor lip syncing routine and that's when I realized just how heavy Bubbles really was. Now picture if you will... we're seating on a sectional couch... on the very corner was myself, next to me was Brie, in the corner was Marina and next to her was Miss Carrie Lynn. During the middle of this hoping routine, Bubbles decides to lay across myself, Brie and Marina and poorly lip sync to Apple Face Carrie. Now, rather than complete get up, Bubbles decides to sit up right on my lap while still horrendously lip syncing to Cherry Face Carrie. Yes... Sarah's lap... STRONG LIKE BULL!

So... the routine has ended.... not before a happy little ripping off of the Donna Summer-esque skirt into a BEEEEAAAUUUTIFUL sequins one piece that no one should wear, much less Bubbles and Tomato Face Carrie is called to stand up front with our busted Bubbles. First, Bubbles asks for some bubbly (ha ha ha.. get it?!) and Carrie pulls the "oh i don't drink" line... so she calls for some soda instead. Once the annoying "oh I love drag queen" whores in the crowd stop going "GIVE ME THE CHAMPAGNE!!" We continue with our enjoyable little show. So the name and age is asked of our Fireball Face Friend and then turns to the rest of us on the couch and asks who would like to spank her! Default very quickly set in and Marina got up. Apparently, Marina has the hand of a pool noodle and who got to do the spanking honors???!!!! YUP FOLKS YOU GUESS IT.... THE SAD ASS, DONNA SUMMER RIP OFF, NEEDS A NEW WIG, AND SHOULD NOT HAVE BREAST IMPLANTS WITHOUT LEARNING HOW TO DO A BETTER TUCK JOB, BUBBLES!!!!

This would be the point in which I think I could ask for pretty much anything from my beloved and she would HAVE to oblige because I did not call her out in this whole birthday escapade, and for anyone who is curious... I would have no problem taking care of the job so that my girlfriend would not have to be spanked by a sad story of a Drag Queen.

Oh believe me... it was a very very very enjoyable event to witness, and although I felt that I would pass out at any moment due to working on that damn thesis all day, I can't say that I would have ever missed that for the world. HOW'S IT FEELING MISS BAD COLOR FACE??!! (if you saw The Village.. you would get that last joke)

Ok, that's my story... If you click on Brie's link and Carrie's link... I'm sure you will get an equally enjoyable recap of the nights events.

G'night kiddies!

Perfection

A Brie-fined Masterpiece

Every morning I wake up, feed the cat, and quickly brush over to my handy dandy powerbook to read the post that my wonderful girlfriend had stayed up till 2am working on the night before. What's it like to fall asleep next to your loved one?? Hmmm... I think I'm starting to forget.... DAMN YOU BLOGGER!!! Now, I knew that this very special girl was extremely talented, but I had forgotten how deep her talent goes in the realm of writing. Therefore... I bow down and officially give my Brie-nown girlfriend the throne that is Blogging. Please for the sake of your own quickly dying humor, click on the link above, save it into your favorites, and read often.

I'm so lucky!!! Love you dumping!

I'm stuck in a time warp.. LETS TO THE TIME WARP AGAAAINNNN

Why must time go by sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo slow. I've been sitting here for the past 45 minutes watching the clock tick away... Why? BECAUSE I'M STILL AT WORK! So.. currently, there are myself and two attorney's in the office... Are they attorney's I care to talk to?! NOT SO MUCH! One walks like she's always on a runway... who doesn't that?! Aside from me when I sleepwalk I mean... The other for the past two weeks has talked to me about nothing else than this stupid trip he's taking to Montana. Just because I wore a patagonia fleece one day.... WHAT DOES THAT AUTOMATICALLY MAKE ME JUAN VALDEZ??!! (Does that work?) Do I really care that much about the outdoors? That's a big negative.. Do I like the outdoors and camping? Sure... just make sure I have my beer right next to me. I WANT TO GO HOMEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pip

This is my kitty in RI... please take note of my mom's flowers!

Pip Originally uploaded by sarahs.

E Man

This is one of the only men in my life. Trust me... there aren't many!

E Man Originally uploaded by sarahs.

POSERS!!!

Ok, so by now... we've all seen this --> In case you've been living under a rock, it is a bracelet for the Lance Armstrong Foundation, which Nike is supporting with no proceeds going to Nike at all. 100% of all proceeds go to the LAF (just in case anyone needed clarifying... shhhh). Now that we're all caught up, the building in which I work has a cafe on the first floor. Anyone who works in New Haven is probably familiar with this place. So, usually every day, I'll mosey down there around 2:30-3:00 to get my daily fix of caffeinated sugar water (in lamens terms... Coke). ppsssshhhh.... ahhh... Hello old friend! Ok, so a couple of days ago, I, as usual, go down for my soda and I give the dude... I think his name is Luigi (I'm not joking) my money and I, of course have my LiveStrong bracelet on. So, Luigi says to me "hey, you have one of those!" and I said "yeah, you can get them at Zanes in Branford of Nike in Clinton" and he says to me "yeah I have to get one, I just think they look fashionable." Whatever... I could get all huffy and puffy about how it's for a good cause and whatever, but I just let it roll. Now, mind you, there is another bitchcake chick working there at the time and heard this entire conversation. So... fast forward 24 hours. I'm back downstairs getting my addiction and the same bitchcake is ringing me out. SHE'S WEARING THE BRACELET!!!! I should mention here that when he asked me about mine, I made it a point to see if either of them were wearing one and neither of them were. So, I leave this place and all I can think is.... WHAT A POSER!!! Because not for one second did I mention the cause when speaking with Luigi. My take away... Bitchcake has a thing for Luigi (she's wants to be his princess... the nintendo fans will get that joke) and it's a pretty sad way to go about getting his attention. Bottom line... DONT BE A POSER!

wristband_home Originally uploaded by sseward5.

I love you... You love me... Someone please gouge out my eye... with a pitchfork, butter knife, I dont really care... just dont show my underwear!

Why is it that annoying women always seem to find me regardless of where I work? Let's examine this for a few moments...

I now work in a law office and there is a woman in the Hartford office, who likes to call me up and tell me the wrong things that I've done. For example, we open these new cases all the time. I have a happy little form to fill out and then it gets sent up to Hartford to be entered into the system and given a docket number. This woman... JUDY... loves to call me and say things like "when filling these out you should really try to remember that when putting down a contact number for the client... to write whether it's an office number or a home number" nevermind the fact that the field clearly states "Office Number." So it's the beginning of a month which means we need to bill all of our clients for time spent on their cases from last month. Two of my attorney's failed to enter time for two days... does Judy call them up??? NOPE!!! She calls me.... do I enter their time??!! Not Usually!!! Whatever, she calls me up to remind them.. I can handle that.. but what I can't handle is having her call me the first time at 4:30pm and then calling me again at 9am the next morning to tell me THE SAME THING!!! Ugghhh... a great day is when I don't hear from Judy.

Ok... so that's just one, you're thinking "eh.. could be worse"... Oh wait... I have more.... Now, there's Linda. Towards the beginning of the summer, I worked at another law office in Bridgeport. This one didn't allow their secretaries to have internet access. They didn't even have it hooked up. So, I had to kill a lot of time. At first, it was fine. I was sitting near Ruth. She was a nice old lady to chatted it up with me... then I got moved next to Linda... Ok... Linda is the type of person that you would see at some outdoor herbal/incense market. Veryyyy hippie, long stringy hair, you know the kind. She would tell me these stories about how her back was always bothering her, and she would try to go for walks to make it feel better. Things I really didn't want to hear... Then she would tell me these stories about how she was going to Europe with her boyfriend... yeah, she's the type of old woman with a boyfriend, who played in a band. I think you can grasp the concept of Linda pretty easily...

Still not too bad right? Ok... well... let me introduce you to Muzzle. Most call her Michelle, but she's not worthy of that... in Sarah land... we call her Muzzle. Muzzle is a person that you cry when you find out that you have to work for her... now, up until now, we've been talking about people who happen to work where you do... Muzz is different.. I used to work FOR her. First there is the laugh. Ok, I don't know what it was, but I think this company just attracted people who have HORRIBLE laughs. The kind of laughs that when you hear them.. you want to run your arm through a meat grinder because it would be less painful than to hear these laughs. Now... this chick with the bad laugh liked to be lazy. She used to love to widdle away the hours talking with another very special person who worked there about nothing.. well that's not true... they would usually talk about one of two things: Reality TV or other people that work there. Secondly, when it came time to do work, little Muzzle was not a big fan, so she would pawn her work off on other poor souls that worked for her like myself and my good friend Igis. Then there were those moments when she would turn into someone human and be very nice and joking with you and you would think "wow... maybe it's not so bad to travel 2 hours one way to come to this job everyday" then... like MACK TRUCK you're hit with a wave of rudeness and harshness. Doesn't this sound fun? Are you jealous? I bet! I could go on, but my blood is starting to boil and I dont think that's very healthy. So... I suppose that Muzzle isn't really annoying as much as she's just a huge uber bitch!

With that... keep this in mind kids... Open the door... Get on the Floor... Everybody Walk The Dinosaur.

HTML should be HFS

When I was a kid, HTML seemed so simple. I used to do websites when I was younger no problem... i was killer with backgrounds and links and icons... all that junk... something happens when you grow up... I think it might be the lost brain cells from the beers I so happily consume, but after tonight's escapade... I believe that HTML should be renamed HFS... HAVE FUN SUCKER!

I just spent close to 2.. count them.. 1.. 2.. hours just trying to figure out the f-ing break code

So.... for all those dumb ass people out there.. who currently have no significant other and are going to try and tell me how easy HFS is... to them i quote a line from a great movie: It was hard for me.... SO BACK OFF!!! (can you name it??!! Mucho points if you can).

Ok, I must go lay in a corner and play with my cat's toys to amuse myself.

PEEEAAAAACCCCCEEEEE

Hmmm...

Ok, so I wanted to find a picture of someone stupid or doing something stupid, just for a chuckle and when searching for that stupid picture I found this --> Yup... that pretty much says it all. Ahh... don't we love our country. Oh and by the way... has anyone else noticed that his eyes are blood shot?? Just Wondering.

red eyed bush Originally uploaded by sseward5.

AHHHH!!!! YOU FOUND ME!

DA DA DA DA!!!! Welcome to my blog. So yyeeeaaahhhh you're going to have to come in on Saturday. No, really though, this first one shall be short due to the fact that a) still getting my feet wet so to say and b) because ssshhhh, i'm at work. Tee hee hee.

Anyway, from time to time.. ok more often than that I get these strange and intriguing thoughts in my mind and what better way to get them out then to post them on the internet for all to see!! (as I slowly creep my infectious thoughts out there in order to slowly TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!)

Ok, so here shall be my first intro. What is up with all these commentary shows that Vh1 is making sooooo many bucks off of? First, it started with I Love the 80s, which growing up in the late 80s, early 90s, I found quite enjoyable, I will admit. So... they thought, wow, that worked... lets do... I love the 70s!! wow were they way off base! First, just because they target an older audience, doesn't mean that 30-40 somethings are watching their channel and whats more... who cares about the 70s! Did the 70s have stonewash jeans, banana clips and off the shoulder sweatshirts? I THINK NOT! People only want to hear about trainwreck fads! So... they thought... hmm.. how can we make this better... oh i know... I Love The 80s, Strikes Back! Get it... Star Wars... Very Cleaver. Also... enjoyable. Mostly, because this time the no-talent assclowns didn't forget jelly shoes! Honestly... dropped the ball on that one first time around guys... Ok, so it cooled off for a while and people started saying "dude... wouldn't it be cool to have an I Love The 90s?" and... VOILA! A new star was born. It was enjoyable as well, but it didn't have that luster that the "80s" did. So... hey.... talk about a cash cow... LETS DO ALL OF OUR PROGRAMMING AROUND THIS!!! Now... we have... all of the "I Love..." shows... AND Best Week Ever. I get it guys... it works for you.. but seriously... Best Week Ever... It's only going to work if you get Rachel Harris in on the action... everyone knows she made the I Love The 80s for you. Above everything though... if I honestly wanted to know what people thought about whats going on in media and the world... if I wanted the opinion of someone I will never meet... I'D JUST READ BLOGS!!! Do I really care what Ant thinks about the Kerry Daughters? NO!

AND don't even get me started on Celebrities A 2 Z... that's a winner...

So.. what have we learned from all this? Just because something works once, doesn't mean it's going to work again, did everyone forget "I Still Know What You Did Last Summer" or "Starship Troopers 2" or my personal favorite "Speed 2?" Seriously...

I must leave you now... I Love The 90s, Part Deux is on soon.

I'M OUT LIKE A FAT KID IN DODGE BALL!